To Whom It May Concern
by Schyzotypal X
Summary: Tenten uses her stealth skills to text Sakura about how itchy her dress is...


So I got bored again, and needed something to occupy me for about an hour.

It's more like dialogue, I know, but can you blame me? I hate chatspeak and I don't even know HOW to text on my cellphone!

Oh well, whatever, enjoy.

* * *

**To Whom It May Concern**

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Psssst. Sakura.

**CherryBlossomz:** What Tenten?

**KnivesInUrEyes:** I'm texting you!... stealthily!

**CherryBlossomz:** Tenten, not today, seriously, this is important to me.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Oh come on, every dinner you have with chicken head is important. Lets get the fuck out of here.

**CherryBlossomz:** NO! Tenten! FUCK!...AND DON'T CALL SASUKE THAT!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** But SAKU-CHAN

**CherryBlossomz:** Don't fucking call me that either! Tenten, you're my friend and all, but I'm not going to spend this entire dinner texting you underneath the table.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Look Sakura, my thumbs hurt, this ball gown is itchy, and I'm pretty sure that at least five old dudes are fucking EYE-RAPING ME!

**SexyWind:** Whazup my homie G's.

**CherryBlossomz**: Temari please stop with the gangster talk. It's terrible.

**SexyWind**: it's GANGSTA bitch.

**CherryBlossomz:** Whatever, I'm gonna hang up soon.

**SexyWind**: What going on?

**KnivesInUrEyes**: Sakura's too much of a pansy to leave her boyfriend alone for a few hours so she can go have some fun.

**SexyWind:** You mean you're turning down a chance to get the fuck out of here?

**CherryBlossomz:** It's not a party, it's a _dinner _you know, something that involves class.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Hey, I have class!

**CherryBlossomz:** Oh c'mon, the last time we went to a party you got drunk and started trying to hump Neji on the coffee table.

**SexyWind:** Ruining my game by the way. I was this close to seeing Sasuke naked in the pale moonlight and you screwed it.

**CherryBlossomz:** You played strip poker with Sasuke?!?!?

**SexyWind:** No, even better, strip Monopoly.

**Blonde&Beautiful:** What's this about Sasuke naked in the moonlight?

**CherryBlossomz:** WHORES! All of you!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Hey Ino, help us get Saku-chan to leave.

**Blonde&Beautiful**: We're leaving? Finally! Even I have to admit that this party sucks.

**CherryBlossomz**: You guys all have no sense of class!

**ILUVNARUTO**: ummm…what are you guys talking about?

**CherryBlossomz:** holy shit, HINATA!?

**SexyWind**: Dude, that screen name is pathetic.

**Blonde&Beautiful**: You think that's bad, you should have seen Sakura's back when we were genin.

**CherryBlosssomz**: SHUT UP INO!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** NO! TELL US INO!

**Blonde&Beautiful:** TeamSasuke101

**SexyWind:** NO!

**Blonde&Beautiful:** YES!

**CherryBlossomz:** Shut the fuck up! I hate you all!

**ILUVNaruto:** Even me?

**CherryBlossomz**: except for you Nata.

**I3Naruto**: **(:**

**CherryBlossomz**: As for the rest of you, I'm hanging up.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** No! Escapar! Escapar de la policía!

**SexyWind:** Was that...

**Blonde&Beautiful:** YOU NEVER SAID YOU KNEW SPANISH!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** No, I only know that and Por favor, me tornillo.

**ILUVNaruto:** What's that mean?

**KnivesInUrEyes:** Please screw me.

**SexyWind**: High fives man!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** I know!

**CherryBlossomz**: That's it, I'm going.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** NOOOO SAKURA! PLEASE!

**SexyWind:** Yeah, seriously, do you really wanna stay here for another two hours? Watching that Hyuga Elder dude eye-hump you from over the sushi?

**ILUVNaruto:** TEMARI!

**SexyWind:** YOU KNOW HE IS!

**Blonde&Beautiful:** That guy IS pretty creepy…

**CherryBlossomz:** I'm going…AND DON'T INSULT HYUGA-SAN!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** WAIT SAKURA! NOOOO!

**CherryBlossomz:** Goodbye Tenten.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** BUT!

**CherryBlossomz:** NO BUTS! You knew this was coming when you started dating Neji so now you should just do what I'm doing and bite the goddamn bullet!

**SexyWind:** So who did Ino and I date to get into this situation?

**Blonde&Beautiful:** YEAH! Tentens dating a dead-end lazy know-it-all

**SexyWind:** And BIYATCH over there is dating a dumb fatass!

**CherryBlossomz:** You guys are terrible. I'm going.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** BUT

**CherryBlossomz:** GOING!

**KnivesInUrEyes:** …fine…

**CherryBlossomz:** goodbye Tenten.

**KnivesInUrEyes:** bye…

**SexyWind:**...

**Blonde&Beautiful:**...

**SexyWind**:..Are they…gone?

**Blonde&Beautiful:** Yeah…I think they are…wow.

**SexyWind:…**Hey Ino.

**Blonde&Beautiful:** Yeah.

**SexyWind:** You didn't REALLY mean any of that shit you said about me and Shikamaru? Right?

**Blonde &Beautiful: …**

**SexyWind:** RIGHT!?...Ino!?INO!?

**ILUVNaruto:** Is this a bad time to ask just exactly what you guys are talking about?

* * *

Plot ninjas are fucking with me.

...AndIreallyliketoworkwithonlydialogue.

But mostly ninjas!


End file.
